Down the Tube

I write tonight purely for the sake of writing, I feel the need to write, I want to sit and work on the book until the early hours of the morning, but I've had a busy day t work and feel exhausted. I've been interviewing candidates for th vacancy of editorial assistant and feel mentally drained. More interviews are planned tomorrow and the next day. It's the first time I've ever interviewed people for a job, it feels strange being the interviewer and not the interviewee. It was my first day back and there was a Tube strike in London and train fares have gone up 5%.

As if I didn't have enough problems, my laptop is kaput. I thought I was doing the write thing by doing a full system restore as there were problems with the harddrive, but in essence it was working OK, if a little slow. I spent 12 hours on Friday trying to reboot it but it just freezes. I took it into the repair shop and the engineers basically told me it wasn't worth repairing - I could get a new one for the cost of a hardrive. It means i'm goingh to have to spend 500-600 pounds on a new model, after spending 400 pounds on a motherboard in April.

I've also bought a desktop for the family, which I'm going to have to use. I'll have to write on the train in my notebook and type it up at night, but after a 12-hour day working on a computer this is not ideal. I have to get a new laptop so I can continue to work on the train.

I have a bout 20,000 words of the first draft written, I had hope to have 40,000 by the end of the holidays, but due to technical problems and marriage meltdown, it just hasn't been possible.
I need to make more money, to buy a laptop and provide for the family. My wife has finally realised what she does doesn't make money, despite all the time and energy she puts into her artwork and trying to survive on one income is a struggle, especially with our high overheads.

We'ved decided to stay together for the time being. We're going to try and get a house, eg mortgage, and get some security, my wife is looking for a job and I'm trying to get a mortgage. I need to have the kids safe and secure before I think about leaving. In the meantime we're working on the relationship, trying to sort out the problems, but of we get the house and things are still not right between us then I'll move out.

Very frustrated with life, feeling like packing my job in and staying home to write, but it's not possible.